www.facebook.com/862760275/posts/10165342422830276/

when somebody else tries

to tell you how you should grieve

smile and forgive them

through your watering eyes

and then imagine

how lonely it must be

to be the person who

audits the tears

of other people

the well-intended

will tell you how

long you should miss

your beloved

but

you take your time

grief is a hedge maze

and being lost inside of it

is more than okay

don’t race through

your heartache

because you might

just miss a miracle

or two

in the teardrops rolling

down your face

don’t grieve quickly

just to make somebody

else feel better

if you need to,

let your grief

become a coral reef

let the algae of your hurt

slowly form over the years

into the softest violet hue of heaven

it can take two lifetimes to recover

when our beloved becomes

an empty chair

it’s okay

take as much time

as you need

your healing is your healing

and the scars of absence

will itch longer than you can imagine

but that is because you

risked to love so deeply

and that is far better than

the alternative

I am proud of you

and the courage it

takes for you to grieve

so fearlessly

don’t listen to those

who want you to go back

to normal

normal will never exist again

for those of us who have

lost a part of our heart

if the moon broke in half

would it feel normal?

to hell with normal

normal was their scent on your collar

normal was their voice resting in your ear

normal was their touch on your skin

you have a new normal

it’s looking at the shape of clouds

for messages from the great beyond

that your beloved is fine

you have a new normal

it’s building a cabin in

the woods of your memory

where you and your beloved

can meet for lunch

you have a new normal

it’s crying and laughing

at the same time

whenever their favorite

song plays on the radio

grief isn’t the enemy

of life

numbness is

don’t become numb to your suffering

welcome it in

and let it wrap you

up like a blanket

whenever it shows up

at your door

it’s okay

I swear

it’s okay

your beloved misses you just

as much as you miss them

and someday

you two will

get all tangled up

together again

someday

you two will

push each on a

swing again under

a shower of falling blooms

and someday

you two will ride

comets together

on the edge of everything

and someday

you two will giggle

at all of the people

who tried to tell you

how to grieve

~ john roedel (johnroedel.com)

(Photo: Daniel Radford)