I had never counted the days since Richard died. Early on I may have, but then it turned into counting weeks, months, and now years. This morning someone on a page I follow wrote about 1000 days and it caught my attention. If I did my math correctly, it has been 879 days. I am grateful and thankful for so many things today – the 879th day. I’m so glad that Richard and I met and got married. We were clueless, with no grandiose plans for the future. Like most couples, we had good times and bad times over the years. But each and every day, I’m thankful for the life we built together. One of my favorite things about Richard is how he can make me laugh. 879 days later, he still makes me laugh almost daily. The girls and I (and others) share stories about something he did or said and I laugh out loud. I am happy that I learned and decided very early after his death, to mourn in a way that is healing for me. I have experienced death and loss before, but never like this. I knew I not only had to find a way to survive my grief, but to thrive and find joy in life. I truly believe that mourning openly, honestly, and fully is the key to healing after the death of a loved one. While I have missed him in so many ways over the last 879 days, today I’m thankful for love, relationships, healing, growth, and life.

If you are experiencing the death of a loved one and haven’t given yourself permission to mourn honestly, openly, and fully, I believe you should! I believe it is the pathway to healing.